How to Stop Jealousy in a Relationship

Jealousy has always been a problem in many relationships. That green-eyed monster is always lurking somewhere, ready to cook up some trouble and strain in the relationship. It is important that partners should know how to deal with jealousy and know when to stop it the moment that it tries to affect the relationship.

Jealousy can easily destroy an relationship. All means should be done to stop it whenever such feelings crop up. One of the best ways to stop jealousy is by better communication between partners. Better communications would allow both man and woman to talk about what would make them jealous and understanding each one better.

Communication would also help partners establish guidelines in the relationship that would determine what would be acceptable and unacceptable behavior. This would help a lot in taking the uncertainties away that usually develop into jealousy in most relationships.

Jealousy may come into a relationship by way of suspicion. Being suspicious of your partner would easily tell that you do not trust him or her. And sometimes such suspicions are not based on facts but merely by way of emotions and insecurities.

The best way to stop jealousy is by remaining objective and trying to get to the root of the suspicion rather than make emotions fuel it towards jealousy. And more importantly, trust on your partner will play a big part on stopping jealousy. This is also the part where better communication will help clear things up. Being open and honest about your feelings toward your partner may help put everything into perspective.

When dealing with jealousy, it is also important to seek the help of a friend. Try to have an objective buddy who can tell you what’s right and wrong especially if you feel that you are harboring that green-eyed monster. Sometimes jealousy can make a person become blind to what reality is. It would take an objective friend to tell you if you are already behaving in an irrational manner. An honest friend can always make you realize what is right and if your emotions are just getting the best of you.

Another way to stop jealousy is by building up on self-confidence and self-esteem. Insecurity about oneself can easily lead one to become jealous. If you begin to lack e assurance that your partner is still attracted to you, then you might become an easy prey to jealousy. By just being confident and sure about yourself and your partner would help stop jealousy from becoming a problem in your relationship.

101 Romantic Things To Do With Your Lover

1. Watch the sunset together.

2. Take showers together.

3. Back rubs/massages.

4. Listen to classical music and cuddle in the dark or w/ blacklight.

5. French Kiss.

6. Hold her w/ hands inside the back of her shirt.

7. Whisper to each other.

8. Cook for each other.

9. Skinny dip.

10. Make out in the rain.

11. Dress each other.

12. Undress each other.

13. Kiss every part of their body.

14. Hold hands.

15. Sleep together. (Actually sleep with each other…not sex)

16. One word…Foreplay

17. Sit and talk in just underwear.

18. Buy gifts for each other.

19. Roses.

20. Find out their favorite cologne/perfume and wear it every time you’re together.

21. Wear his clothes.

22. Find a nice secluded place to lie and watch the stars.

23. Incense/candles/oils/blacklights and music make for great cuddling/sex.

24. Kiss at every chance you get.

25. Don’t wear underwear and let them find out.

26. Kinky is bad…Blindfolds are good.

27. Lightly kiss their collarbone and their jawbone just below the ear, then whisper I love you.

28. Bubble baths.

29. Go for a long walk down the beach at midnight.

30. Make love.

31. Write poetry for each other.

32. Kiss/smell her hair.

33. Hugs are the universal medicine.

34. Say I love you, only when you mean it and make sure they know you mean it.

35. Give random gifts of flowers/candy/poetry etc.

36. Tell her that she’s the only girl you ever want. Don’t lie.

37. Spend every second possible together.

38. Tell her that she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to. And mean it.

39. Look into each other’s eyes.

40. Very lightly push up her chin, look into her eyes, tell her you love her, and kiss her lightly.

41. Talk to each other using only body language and your eyes.

42. When in public, only flirt w/ each other.

43. Walk behind her and put your hands in her front pockets.

44. Put love notes in their pockets when they aren’t looking.

45. Clothes are no fun.

46. Buy her a ring.

47. Keep one of her bras somewhere where you see it everyday.

48. Sing to each other.

49. Read to each other.

50. PDA = Public Display of Affection.

51. Take advantage of any time alone together.

52. Tell her about how you answered every question in math with her name.

53. Draw. (If you can)

54. Let her sit on your lap.

55. Go hiking and camp out together in the woods or on a mountain.

56. Lips were made for kissing.
So were eyes, and fingers, and cheeks, and collarbones, and hands, and ears.

57. Kiss her stomach.

58. Always hold her around her hips/sides.

59. Guys like half-shirts.

60. Take her to dinner and do the dinner for two deal.

61. Spaghetti… (Ever see Lady and the Tramp?)

62. Hold her hand, stare into her eyes, kiss her hand and then put it over your heart.

63. Unless you can feel their hear beating, you aren’t close enough.

64. Dance together.

65. Sit in front of a roaring fire and make out/make love.

66. I love the way a girl looks right after she’s fallen asleep with her head in my lap.

67. Carry her to bed.

68. Waterbeds are fun.

69. You figure it out.

70. Do cute things like write I love you in a note so that they have to look in a mirror to read it.

71. Break every one of your parent’s relationship rules for them.

72. Make excuses to call them every 5 minutes

73. Even if you are really busy doing something, go out of your way to call and say I love you.

74. Call from your vacation spot to tell them you were thinking about them.

75. Remember your dreams and tell her about them.

76. Ride your bike 8 miles just to see them for a few hours.

77. Ride home and call them.

78. Tell each other your most sacred secrets/fears.

79. Somehow incorporate them into any kind of religion or worship you have.

80. Be Prince Charming to her parents. (Brownie Points)

81. Act out mutual fantasies together. (Not necessarily sexual)

82. Brush her hair out of her face for her.

83. Stay up all night to think of 101 ways to be sweet to them.

84. Hang out with his/her friends. (more brownie points)

85. Go to church/pray/worship together.

86. Take her to see a romantic movie and remember the parts she liked.

87. Cuddle together under a full moon on a clear night.

88. Learn from each other and don’t make the same mistake twice.

89. Everyone deserves a second chance.

90. Describe the joy you feel just to be with him/her.

91. Make sacrifices for each other.

92. Really love each other, or don’t stay together.

93. Write a fictional story about how you met/fell in love, etc. and give it to them.

94. Let there never be a second during any given day that you aren’t thinking about them,
and make sure they know it.

95. Love yourself before you love anyone else.

96. Learn to say sweet things in foreign languages.

97. Dedicate songs to them on the radio.

98. Fall asleep on the phone with each other.

99. Sleep naked together.

100. Stand up for them when someone talks trash.

101. Never forget the kiss goodnight. And always remember to say, "Sweet dreams."

How Do I Love Thee?

by : Elizabeth Barrett Browning

How do I love thee?
Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of every day's
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints - I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life!
-and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

The Passionate Shepherd To His Love

by : Christopher Marlowe

Come live with me and be my love,
And we will all the pleasures prove
That valleys, groves, hills, and fields,
Woods, or steepy mountain yields.
And we will sit upon the rocks,
Seeing the shepherds feed their flocks,
By shallow rivers to whose falls
Melodious birds sing madrigals.

And I will make thee beds of roses
And a thousand fragrant posies,
A cap of flowers, and a kirtle
Embroidered all with leaves of myrtle

A gown made of the finest wool,
Which from our pretty lambs we pull;
Fair lined slippers for the cold,
With buckles of the purest gold:

A belt of straw and ivy buds,
With coral clasps and amber studs;
And if these pleasures may thee move,
Come live with me and be my love.

The shepherd swains shall dance and sing
For thy delight each May morning;
If these delights thy mind may move,
Then live with me and be my love.

4 Ways to Plan a Surprise for Boyfriend or Husband

Are you looking for a way to plan a surprise for boyfriend or husband? You have picked up a great Dating Buzz. Wondering what men like or how a man would love to be surprised? Women love to plan a surprise for boyfriend or husband but are often out of ideas of how they could do it. Especially when your they are difficult to get surprised easily. Then check out this 4 ways for women to plan a surprise for boyfriend or husband. I'm sure this tips will make your them guessing but without risking to uncover your actual surprise.

Hidden Tickets to a Concert or Favorite Sports Game

You could get them tickets to a sports game or a concert if they are hardcore fan of a band or a sports team and usually that is what men like. The refrigerator, his wallet or in a pocket of his favorite shirt would be a great place to hide the tickets where your boyfriend or your husband will find them on their own. You can't imagine how surprised they will be when they find the ticket and even more when they see what tickets are they for. A great surprise for boyfriend or husband. Bet you haven't thought about this Dating Buzz.

Night on the Town surprise!

Plan a night out in town if you consider to have a special and romantic surprise with your partner. Before the actual day of the surprise, plan out all the stops you want to visit in town. But to keep this to a great surprise, you will need to insist him that you should drive for the night to ensure he has no idea as to where the next destination will be. Take him to some of his favorite places. It will be great to be driven around especially when driven to a new and interesting places. What men like is not to be the driver all the time too.

Have a Surprise Party

It is not as difficult as you think to have a surprise party. What you need to do to keep the surprise going is to just tell your boyfriend or husband that you are planning a special night for his birthday just the two of you. This will keep him in oblivion and eventually catch him off guard at the party by not expecting a crowd of family and friends. This is the most common Dating Buzz.

Scavenger Hunt

This can easily be the best surprise for boyfriend or husband. Depending on your preferences and your motivation you can vary the size of the hunt. A simple scavenger hunt would be by just putting clues around your house. However it could be much more interesting to make a larger scavenger hunt by placing all the clues in a well-hidden public areas. What men like would be to include his favorite places into the scavenger hunt.

There is another method for a scavenger hunt. You can do this by telling your boyfriend or husband to look for a specific item. For this, you are required to list some of your favorite things (things both of you like), and tell them to look for the items and take a picture of it.

These different surprise for boyfriend and husband will work at different occasion. For a great dating buzz you will need to think of the method that is best to work with the surprise you already planned. Also think about best way to keep your surprise a secret. And best of all, have fun!

By: Macdlena Jonathan - articlebase.com

5 Great Online Dating Tips

Nowadays, thanks to the internet, it’s easier than ever to date. Gone are the days of only meeting people in your immediate circle of friends and the grotesque spectacle of nightclubs and bars, you may now specify your ideal mate and search through thousands of people that might be looking for you. Here are some tips to maximize your experience.

1. Be sure to know as much as possible about your astrological ‘sign’
Know what kinds of other signs work with yours and what kinds don’t. It is of the utmost importance that you arbitrarily narrow the playing field. While on a date be sure to mention how compatible your 2 signs are, and say things like, “It’s so like a Taurus to not believe in astrology.” Many websites will not even allow you to leave this section blank, so it’s best to be on board; recognizing this as an outdated superstition will only hurt your chances.


2. Only use extreme close-ups or photoshopped images
Appearance is important so it’s best if you try to hide yours, after all if you were attractive you wouldn’t be on a dating website. Another good strategy is to use a picture that is wildly out of date or that has multiple people in it. Are you the hot guy in a tight shirt catching the Frizbee or the troll who is throwing it? Women should also use pictures of themselves with former boyfriends (it shows you can be in a relationship).

3. Mention how you “Hate Games”
Ladies, don’t you hate games? Tell people how much you hate games so they will know how much you hate games.

4. It doesn’t have to be about dating
A lot of women go on dating websites just to meet friends, but don’t spoil a perfectly good evening by mentioning this to your date. Wait until the night is over then, as he leans in to kiss you, mention that you “have a boyfriend.”

5. Meet in a safe place
Like your/their apartment.

How to Impress Your Date on the First Date

Do you still recall the time your first date turned out a disaster? How about the second date or maybe the third one? You underwent several first dates with so many people but they don't call you after that first night out. Now, you can stop moping in your room worrying that you'll end up as a spinster or a bachelor. There are many ways on how to keep your date hooked up on you. Below are just some of the things to keep in mind to let that phone ring right after the first rendezvous.

1. Dress for Comfort. The first rule when going out on a date, especially for first timers, is being comfortable. Start off with your dress. Even if it is better to create a good impression on your date by slipping into your slick black dress and stilettos, you won't earn a good mark if you keep on checking out your behind for possible panty lines. Dress for comfort and not just for a good impression. If you really find it awkward to put on something girly from the usual tees and sneakers you wear everyday, forget about the pointy shoes and opt for a flat pair of sandals or shoes for a stylish effect sans the pain in the legs. Before anything else, consider the place where you will be going. It is safer to ask your date where he plans to take you. You wouldn't want to be wearing a chic dress just to watch her favorite basketball game in a stadium, right?

2. Watch Your Manners. There is nothing more disgusting than the sight of your date stuffing food in his mouth one after the other. One major turn off is also a quick case of make up and lipstick retouch in the table. It's not a crime to excuse yourself for a while to go the powder room and do your deed. It isn't that you need to act like a princess when dining out with your date; just be conscious enough to know the do's and don'ts. Laughing your heart out when your date tells something which you find really funny is alright, but not to the point of spewing your food all over the table, more so on your date. Be natural, but be refined.

3. Be Interactive. Bear in mind that the first date is always the initial step in getting to know each other so grab all the opportunity you have to know the other person. Don't just sit there staring at your date the whole evening pretending to listen while you stifle a yawn. Talk. There are no rules or standard topics to talk about on a first date. Topics like embarrassing experience during your grade school or how miserable you were when your cat died are alright as long as you see that your date is interested and doesn't feel awkward with the topic. Seeing that you can talk anything under the sun without being a show off gives an impression that you are a spontaneous person, a plus factor.

4. Have Some Sense of Humor. There was never a study that humor kills so why stop the jokes? Just remember to keep it clean. Keep the ambiance light as much as possible to avoid tension in the air. The only way to avert the anxieties is to let out a few laughs by telling a funny story. Nevertheless, if you are not a born comedian, laughing to some of his jokes and funny stories usually do the trick. Guys love it when you laugh at their jokes.

5. Be Yourself. The top secret to making people like you is to show them the real you. Your date may find your boyish antics weird but he may find it cute thinking that you're a cowboy who can ride with his jokes, activities and someone he can tag along with the guys later.

6. Relax. Butterflies in the stomach, mice running in your heart and the nauseous feeling are normal when going on a first date with someone. However, if you do not loosen up, the worse case that could happen is you won't be able to say any sane thing to your date. Relax and remind yourself that you are on a date to enjoy, not to be stressed.

7. Be Appreciative. Before the night ends, take time to thank your date for spending time with you. You don't have fret, a kiss on a first date is not a must. On the other hand, if you really enjoyed the evening, a peck on the cheek is just fine to show your appreciation followed up by a short text message or phone call later to thank him again for the wonderful night.

Attracting Men – How To Get A Guy To Approach You

Let’s imagine for a second that you’re in a bar; you’ve just spotted a good-looking guy that you want to talk too. How do you get him over?

The first step to attracting men, as I’m sure you will have guessed is eye contact.

1) “The look” – how to do it right.

What you ideally want to do is one quick look in his direction, but then another where you hold his eye contact for just one second longer so that he registers your interest.

2) Lose the bitch face!

Many women fall into the ice-queen trap, where their default facial expression gives off the impression of “If you come up to me, I’ll rip your face off”. Similarly most guys lean against the bar trying to look stony faced like James Bond, thinking if they just look cool enough then a woman will go weak at the knees.

If you want guys to feel relaxed and OK with approaching you, it’s so important to smile and look approachable. You can still be sexy and look like you’re having a good time. Women laughing and smiling is a massive aphrodisiac; that’s why men instinctively want to make women laugh, because it turns us on.

3) Get proximity

One simple way to encourage him to approach you is to position your group close to his. It’s particularly handy if you can position yourself side by side at the bar with him. That way, all he has to do is turn his head to start a conversation, and he knows that if all doesn’t go to plan he can just turn back and carry on chatting to his friends.

4) The last resort: making the move yourself

I know that this article is titled “how to get a guy to approach you” but I still want to give you a few things to fall back on if you’re feeling adventurous enough to initiate a conversation with a guy yourself.

A lot of people put so much emphasis on how you open conversation, when really it’s not a big deal at all, and it’s a lot simpler to do that you would imagine. There are generally two kinds of conversation starters: compliments and questions.

- Compliments

The first is a more direct kind, where you might be a bit more forthcoming. Some women are worried that a compliment will make them appear too easy. But as long as you don’t make it really easy for him by agreeing with everything he says and never challenging him in any way, then a compliment will never devalue you in a guy’s eyes.

For the second type of conversation starter I am going to give you an amazing line to start conversation anywhere. Prepare yourselves because this one if golden: “Hey, can you help me?”

- Asking a favour

If you EVER start a conversation with a guy by saying “I need your help…” the first thing he will do is think, “Anything!” It’s instinctive, because men love to feel manly, and you needing his help will make him feel like more of a man.

Why Momentum Is So Important In Getting Dates

If a girl tries to reschedule the first date, you are looking at something that could kill the interaction. (If she reschedules on a date well after you had sex with her, then it’s usually not a big deal.)

The time between getting her number and seeing her again is when most girls flake, so it’s important you keep that time to under one week. You call within a couple days of meeting her and schedule a date for a couple days after that. If too much time passes until she sees you again, momentum is lost and the interaction loses importance in her mind.

The reason: if she meets a new guy and doesn’t see him for over a week and doesn’t feel any discomfort, how will she come to the realization that it’s important to see him?

If a girl tries to cancel the first date, and you make it easy for her to do so, there’s a risk that date one will never occur. When dealing with a girl’s attempt to cancel, the main idea is to not let her off the hook so easily. Make it uncomfortable for her so there is tension that she attempts to relieve, either by canceling her cancellation or by wanting to quickly reschedule.

Girls usually cancel on the same day of the date through text or phone. If she calls you on the day of the date, let her leave a message by not picking up your phone. Do not respond to her until the very last minute, where she worries that you will actually show up to the date or that you were going to stand her up.

For example if you set a date at 8PM and she cancels at 5, do not call her until 7:15-7:30. The extra time also allows you to think about the best way to respond.

A few months ago I had a first date with a girl I met at a dive bar. It was set at 8:30 but I got a text message in the afternoon from her saying she is not feeling well and needs to cancel. I didn’t respond and went on with my day. I came home, ate dinner, and then got a call from her an hour before the date was supposed to happen. She asked if I received her text message and I said yes, that I was right about to call her. She said that she feels a little bit better and can go out as planned.

In some cases doing NOTHING actually keeps the date on schedule. Who would have thought that?

It’s better to go out with a sick girl or one that is less than 100% ready to have sex because it at least keeps the interaction going. Remember, the more time that passes before the first date, the less important you become.

I took this girl out, did some very light kissing at the end, and then banged her on the next date. Now if I responded to her text message before she felt “better,” the date wouldn’t have happened and it’s possible I may not have gotten the bang.

At the very least, delaying your response stirs up some worry and places you in her mind for a much longer time. I don’t know what a girl is thinking when she is trying to cancel a date, but I think it’s possible that your delayed response would make her think, “Maybe I’m making a mistake.” At best, like in my personal example above, doing absolutely nothing will keep you on the right track.

I wouldn’t have been able to figure out the best way to deal with girls canceling dates unless I got A LOT of dates, but in all of high school and college I got a grand total of two dates. And nothing happened on either date. I was clueless AND sexless.

I made a commitment to solve this problem with a fresh start after college, and proceeded to figure out the best ways to meet girls, talk to them, and get dates. I used to never get dates, but I became a guy who would view a date just as another experiment to figure out women. Imagine how long a way I came.

Now I worry about things other than girls, like the meaning of life and which country I want to visit next.

Dating Rules for Women

The Do's and Dont's of dating for the modern female

Guys: If you don't like this, look away now.

In another dating article on this site, you will find a general set of rules than men should follow when dating. In the same way, women have some general rules that they should contend with when entering the dating jungle. Now I know everyone is different, so don't take things too seriously here. There has been some controversy over some literature published in the USA that lays out in detail the rules a woman should follow to get her guy (or gal). Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider's 1995 bestseller "The Rules," explains how women should play hard if they want to get their guy. I can understand why some groups would be hostile about this, but the fact is that when we grow up, there are a predefined set of dating rules. What happens is that we forget most of them after the age of 21, and then realize we need to relearn them.

I wish there weren't any general rules, but courtship is a ritual. There are things that we make happen that excite, stimulate, create interest and confound. Dating is a long test of compatibility. Are we perfectly matched? If we just threw ourselves together, then the chances of long term happiness might be compromised. And yet previous generations managed to succeed on a far less complex courtship criteria list. Many arranged marriages work all too interestingly.

In every society there are a predefined set of social rules we follow, from the way and timing of eating to the way we behave in public. The issue here is that when women date, there are some things that can help them be more successful. If we accept that dating is a game, then there are rules to that game. There are winners and losers. If you know the rules in advance, it gives you a head start. If men know the rules by which you are playing, you may change the rules to suit the situation to keep the man guessing. Men love a challenge, so feel free to adapt rules and add them as you feel inclined.

You can separate rules out into two parts, dating and online dating. Both areas have distinct rules that a woman should follow for dating success.

General Dating Rules

• Always look great, whatever your income. Gorgeous hair and some lipstick with rags will still turn his head. You have the advantage. You are the woman. Look your best as you could meet a potential Mr. Right anywhere at any time.
• Never reveal information you don't have to. An enigmatic woman drives men wild.
• Keep dates brief, but your men interested. Less is always more.
• Try and stay in shape and involve some fitness regime at a gym. However much you hate it, your Mr. Right loves your body as much as your mind.
• Let your man pay. If he is interested, he is interested enough to ensure you eat well and get home safely in a cab.
• Ensure you receive flowers. If he doesn't know what a florist is, dump him.
• Never ever sleep with a guy until he has fallen for you. Sex early in your dating game plan will ruin everything.
• Always keep a guy waiting and never turn up early. It is a lady's perogative.
• Never be available when he wants you to be. Never be at the end of a phone when he calls and always let him leave a message or two first before replying.
• If he is available Tuesday, you are available Thursday.
• Weekend shopping trips with girlfriends are sacred and not available for dates.
• Keep your man standing on quicksand by shifting landmarks and goalposts constantly.
• Ensure you are a good kisser. Men will walk away if you cannot kiss. Practice on a mirror if you have to.
• Never ever talk about previous boyfriends, particularly their prowess in the bedroom. Your ex-boyfriends are your business only.
• Never assume anything about your date until you choose to know him better. You cannot always tell by looking.
• If any man shows the slightest signs of possessiveness or insecurity, run like the wind. Life is too short for boys.
• If his shoes or hygiene are a disgrace, dump him.
• Never talk too much about your father and how your date measures up in comparison.
• Never ever come across as too available or too desperate. He will run a mile. He is the one doing the chasing.
• If the guy in the corner is gorgeous, go get him and create the need in him for you. Never wait for men to come to you because you may watch him leave with someone else.
• You may well have all the bodily functions of a man, just try not to demonstrate them early on.
• If you want a child, don't mention it on the first few dates.
• Never ever criticize his mother unless you want to remain single.

Online Dating Rules

• Always let them come to you, don't chase them via email.
• Block anyone who annoys you instantly.
• Post the best and most vampish photo you can find.
• Don't reply to instant messages with clever opening lines.
• Remain aloof and let yourself be chased.
• Always reply to emails at least 3 days after receipt.
• Never provide your real email or phone details.
• Always date safely and protect yourself at every turn.
• Make sure your login name is stunning and sexy, as well as enigmatic.
• Do not login for hours on end. Short, rapid visits are best.
• Do not assume the person you are talking to is destitute or sad.
• Never ever reply to emails on weekends. Wait until a weekday.
• Never state how good your sexual performance is in your profile.
• If you don't want to date married men, spell it out in your profile.
• A man who doesn't reply to your email within 3 days should be ignored.
• Make sure your humor levels come across in text.
• Do not chat to hundreds of men at once. The delay in replying is a dead giveaway and your Mr. Right will be off.
• Don't even think about misrepresenting your size or description. They will find out.
• Come across as cool and sophisticated for best results

Ladies, always remember that you are a sexy, desirable woman and the world is your oyster. Always let men do the chasing and always allow yourself to be the chooser. Always stay safe and never risk yourself for the sake of attending a date. Always use a safe dating Website.

Top 10 Dating Tips

Dating Tips and Advice for Singles

Whether you are new to the dating scene, are reentering the dating scene, or are a serial dater, you can use dating tips and advice. No one is a dating expert – even the most beautiful and wealthy people all struggle with matters of the heart. Everyone can learn something about how to date more, how to attract the types of people we want to attract, and how to make sure initial chemistry blooms into an enduring relationship.

The truth is, there are no magic formulas, no fail-proof tricks, no cunning ways of trapping Mr. or Miss Right. There are however some essential facts that you should always bear in mind along the way. Dating tips are just that -- tips, not one-size-fits-all guarantees. Different tacks will work for different people. It depends on the situation, who we are, where we are in our lives, etc. However, there are some threads of advice that are fairly universal and can benefit anyone who practices them:

Top 10 Dating Tips

1.  Get prepared for dating.

If you really want to succeed in the dating game, be ready to commit to dating. Half-heartedness won't work. In fact, it won’t even get you half-way. If you really want to date, put some effort into it. Do some research and think about what you want out of dating. Prepare yourself for the inevitable rejection we all face at some point in dating and commit not to give up.

2. Get your act together.

Begin a regime of looking your best. Join a gym, read health magazines, get fit and start a diet. Get your hair cut or styled and begin a new regime of good grooming or beauty treatment. Though it will not find you a date in itself, you will feel a million times more confident about yourself, and others can sense that.

3.  Go shopping and treat yourself to new clothes and even a whole new look.

Get your image right, one that you can manage and live with, but one that flatters you. Don't try to be someone you’re not, but amplify and accentuate your positives. Throw out those tired jeans, old sweaters or cardigans and spruce yourself up. Your date will appreciate that you demonstrated some effort.

4.  Think about what you want to gain from dating and what timeframes you expect.

Do you see yourself married within 2 years? If you do, then approach dating accordingly. If you are more laid back and don't take dating too seriously then ask yourself some honest questions about why you are dating and what you hope to achieve. If it is purely sex then ask yourself if you are about to be honest with those you hope to date.

5.  Surround yourself with people who will support your dating aims.

By following the first four tips you will feel better and be more focused. Don’t sabotage this by sitting around with friends who are negative about love and relationships (often the married ones). Start attending social functions frequented by singles. Sitting alongside couples at dinner parties in suburbia is not necessarily where you need to be right now.

6.  Choose those you have a good chance of dating.

Be realistic. In other words, your dating is based on the whole package you present as well as just your personality. If you are looking for a glamour girl or boy and want to date someone trendy and gorgeous, great! Just know that others will expect you to be the same.

7. Join clubs, societies, sports events, drama groups -- anything that might help you meet like-minded potential partners.You will not meet people by staying indoors and playing video games – many have tried and failed at this approach.

8.  Take time off from dating occasionally if it’s not going well or causing dating fatigue.

Recharging your batteries and keeping confidence and optimism levels high is an absolute must. We all hit rough patches, but don’t let your search for love become a death march. Date in phases if necessary.

9.  Enjoy dating for what it is, dating.

It is meeting people and socializing and spending time in the company of stimulating individuals who may or may not play a bigger part in your life down the road. The fact is, most people have something interesting to offer. While you may not be out on the dating scene looking for new friends, you may well find one or two fabulous people along the way.

10. Never make yourself too available.

People like mystery and enigma and the thrill of the chase when dating. As part of keeping up the mystery, do not sleep with your dates early on. The longer a person is made to chase and fall for you within reason, the more likely that love may blossom. (And yes, this goes for both men AND women!) If the chemistry peaks too early, your emotions may never have time to catch up and the relationship will eventually wither away.

Dating And Self-Promotion: Believe In Yourself

Boost your self-esteem and date more often

Life, my friend, is not fair. Instead life is one giant advert and in your case you are the creative director and subject of your own advert. No one else is going to do it for you. Get it right and you reap the rewards. Get it wrong and you will be ignored and forgotten. And such is the premise of life for the single dater. Life shouldn't be like this, people should love us for who we are and what we are. They should be able to see our hidden depths immediately and focus in on everything that we know to be good about ourselves. But like any product in the world today, you don't know about it unless you sell it.

Self promotion begins with the basic product for sale - you. If it is no good, no one will buy into it. You may be able to fool the odd one or two but that's about it. So the first step has to be to sort out your product and make sure it is as appealing as possible. Whilst I get lots of comments about how one has matured and is able to look below the surface, the surface is the first thing we encounter so it needs to be presentable.

You have to remember when promoting yourself that first appearances count, however much you hate that truth. And worse still another cliché, people do judge a book by its cover. Almost everything in our daily lives is marketed to us and its rare we get much for free (well this site being one of those rare exceptions!). So in short, you need to go into the bathroom and strip and take a good hard look at yourself. Once you have done that go and put your best clothes on and take another long hard look. The be ruthless about your judgment. You will never see yourself as others do but do be brave enough to ask closest friends what they think too.

Now at this juncture you must concentrate. You already know your good and bad points but be realistic, I know people should love you for everything you are, but lets get to that later. First of all, what can you change about yourself that you can live with and that is possible and that will help you appeal to your chosen market. Don't sell yourself short though. You want to be appealing to as wider an audience as feasible. The also make sure you know your market. If you are 50 and overweight you may not appeal to 21 year olds however much you wish you did. People generally date within a 10 year date range maximum. Beyond that and you are generally in rarity territory.

Okay so you know what can be fixed and you know your market and so the next thing is to go and do something about it. Good intentions never solved anything so get on that treadmill, join that diet class, get yourself out shopping, do get your hair cut and sort out your image. Once you have upgraded and maintained your image, your self confidence will soar. In doing so you willbelieve in the product you are offering - you !. If you believe in yourself you can do anything. Positive mental attitude is the most ignored and underrated thing you can achieve. You can turn yourself around in days and weeks buy feeling good about yourself.

Okay so a few weeks down the line you have recreated your product and you have selected your market and you know it will sell so now its time to go out there and market yourself. Self promotion is the name of the game. In the same was that faint heart never won fair lady, so staying at home in front of the TV never won anyone. Unless you talk to as many people as possible and socialize and join clubs and attend social functions and parties and events you won't meet people. If you don't meet people you won't be able to make impressions on them and allow them to see what you have to offer. Marketing and self promotion isn't just about image, its a numbers game. The more people you meet, the more chance you will encounter someone who wants your product - you!

You will find it easier to approach people because you believe in yourself and the more people you meet who express an interest so the more you will feel good. It is a self fulfilling prophecy. Keep at it and you will never look back. But whilst being sociable and meeting people keep in mind that your self promotion plan has a goal. That goal may be a new relationship. It may be many dates , it may be company or it may even be marriage and children. But whatever it is, part of your overall promotion plan must be to set attainable goals and then go after them. Everything in life takes time and effort to achieve. I know to all of us, some people appear to have it all, but apart from looks which we can't control, the difference between us all is largely down to pure effort. Talents don't mean much unless we use them.

These are some common traits in successful, well-liked people:

• They are happy
• They are fun
• They are reliable
• They make people feel good
• They have a good sense of humor
• They are organized
• They are confident
• They have direction
• They are good listeners and can assist
• They have goals and ambition
• They are dynamic and spontaneous

And remember that if things do take time, your life has already changed for the better and you are well on your way to meeting the person of your dreams. I am sorry to suggest that we view ourselves using the language of commerce as it is somewhat tasteless but it is a simple truth about our modern society. Learn from the world about you to make yourself the most attractive you can be.

When you promote yourself to people when dating try and do the following to assist you in being a successful dater:

• Be nice to all the people you meet
• Meet as many people as you can
• Learn to be sociable and willing
• Learn to smile at people naturally
• Be kind and considerate and generous
• Learn to listen and be open minded
• Lean to like yourself
• Change the things you don't like about yourself
• Give yourself a makeover and be ruthless if necessary
• Don't stay indoors unless necessary
• Learn about what makes people popular and copy their methods
• Try to be happy and content with who you are as a person
• Remove negative aspects and influences in your life permanently
• Set attainable goals for yourself
• have a mental image of how you see yourself in 3 years time and work towards it every day
• Don't suffer fools gladly though. You are not a fool either.

Does Your Perfect Soulmate Actually Exist?

Thoughts on finding

I have a real difficulty with the subject of 'The One' at the moment because I am hearing the phrase mentioned daily yet I think it really has got out of control. I think we are mostly guilty of secretly setting our sights on the perfect person for a relationship and acknowledging anything at all resembling second-best as simply not acceptable at all. In fact we probably discount most people we meet without a second glance. No chemistry! Well not acceptable for us anyway - that's because we are special. The trouble with this contemporary outlook is that it is based on a completely unrealistic set of expectations with goalposts that move by the day (or second - Ed.!).

Let is say that you are 30 and you have had two or three relationships previously. You have a semi decent career that is providing you with a reasonable lifestyle. You have a good set of friends, certain financial independence and a wide and varied set of ideals and tastes that are sophisticated and intelligent. You know what you are about and you know where you may be going. Okay great. So the problem is that you are looking for 'The One'. You are looking for the person who will compliment your lifestyle, your outlook, will be able to bring something to your already hectic lifestyle but will never ever ask you to compromise.

You are in charge of your own destiny and you don't need to compromise so why should you. After all if he is The One, it will all fall into place perfectly. Well you are in for a nasty shock my friends. Life isn't perfect, just switch on the news and look. Marriage isn't perfect as anyone married 40 years+ will happily relate. Everything in life needs working at, and everything in life comes with catches and hitches. There are a couple of key words I will come back to - 'compliment' and 'compromise'.

The problem is our current generations are growing up with expectations that are far exceeding availability. You are looking for the perfect man or woman, you are looking for that 'one' special person and yet amazingly it appears that those who are so selective appear to have heavily overvalued their own 'relationship wealth'. Who says that they have so much to offer. Who says that they are truly nice people who deserve someone. I constantly encounter the word 'compliment' on the profiles of my own dating sites. Women in particular are adept at stating that they are very choosey, that they can be difficult, that they don't suffer fools gladly and that they are very specific as to who they are looking for.

Ask people to describe their perfect mate and they struggle. I have seen a lot of pseudo-spiritual comments lately particularly from women when describing their ideal partner. Think of phrases such as "soul mate" and how often they are used (see below). Its almost like there is a cerebral match that is not defined in physical terms that allows some form of 'communion' or 'union' between 'two souls' at an intellectual and emotional level. Many women friends have said that there needs to be a deep 'connection' or 'chemistry' between them and their partner. Nothing definite there then.

I asked a friend how she defined "The One' and this is what she said:

"The one is a meeting of two minds, bodies and souls, whereby both persons find themselves drawn to each others auras. We want to find the text book mate - everlasting love - our spiritual ideal. As women, we can be easily kneaded like dough and can be moulded as we still have this feminine desire to be needed and loved. We love men's eyes because eyes are the gateway to your soul, piercing yet intuitive."

This statement is extremely interesting not only because of the spiritual notions expressed in a woman's definition of The One but also because she states that women still have a desire to be wanted by men. This leads me to think therefore that a man is still expected to act like a man.

Another girlfriend expressed this view about The One:

"mind you, we have a lot more to lose which is why we harp on about the 'one'. Well, you know about the biological clock, well we have to invest time to find out about a guy to see if he worth our while."

Ah, now things are becoming clearer. Women are looking for the perfect man to make a commitment with because they would like to start a family and don't want to risk getting it wrong. This makes much more sense. To this end I admire the search for a spiritual match and can see its fundamental existence may be critical. Well, except for one thing:

You may remember in a previous article that I tested this spiritual connection and its primary importance out. I simply registered with a well known Internet dating agency and posted my profile with my photo. My profile was genuine and kind and loving and gentle but had a lot added about soul mates and partnerships etc. I am an average to quite good looking guy and received a few matches and emails and messages along the way. After a few months I then altered the photo on the profile from my own to one of a male catalogue model. In the space of one week I had around 180 email, offers of a date and letters with some women almost throwing themselves at me. What horrified me though was that some of these women had already seen this profile with a different photo and ignored it and more importantly the women who got in touch talked about how "spiritually alike" we were and how I appeared to be "their ideal soul mate".

They didn't know me, we had never chatted to me yet they thought I was ideal. These girls had clearly read my profile but the fact was, over 180 women were simply swayed by the way I looked. It had nothing to do with my personality and outlook or any of the details about me whatsoever. Yet to them I was The One. It doesn't feel good to be found out does it! So consequently I have come to the conclusion that many women are indeed searching for "The One". They are looking for that spiritual connection - as long as you are gorgeous and handsome and have a great career.

It is not fair to be too critical of this state of play because I believe the concept of 'The One' has been borne out of a modern liberation of women where they are now able to pick and choose exactly who they want to be with. No woman has to 'make do' anymore and society has evolved and rightly so. The main contention I have is that it is as ruthlessly shallow and misguided as men have ever been accused of in the past. Women do want a good looking man who is in shape. They do want someone who is fun and sexy and a good career and they do want a man who understands commitment and responsibility. But whether they in fact find him is another matter altogether.

I am often told by girlfriends that 'I am happier single than accepting second best'. What is second best? Second best appears to be everything that isn't perfect in the eyes of the beholder. Maybe that means I am second best and if so maybe I should start to feel I have issues! One friend told me this week that she was willing to lower her sights ever so slightly as she gets older but in general she would not be lowering her standards.

Again it ties in with 'the One' who epitomizes all the characteristics of the ideal man. When setting a precedent of standards in dating, people set themselves up to be constantly let down. It is unlikely in the short term that anyone will match their checklist because however great the date has just been, there may be someone waiting who is even better, who is 'the One'. Dating is a chemical reaction. It isn't about checklists, it isn't about computer date matching, it isn't about predetermined ideas about people. It is about communication and intellect and physical chemistry and instant emotions.

The truth is, we are beginning to have a dangerously lonely generation of ThirtySomething women with few partners and absolutely no willingness to compromise. You can blame men all you like, but seeking perfection doesn't guarantee happiness either. The issue ultimately is how these maturing generations will deal with lack of children in their early 40's after leaving things too late. How will they deal with a half lifetime of being single. How will they deal with the fact that their looks are fading and their attitudes have simply left them isolated and unmarried. What we are about to get in my opinion is a potentially troubled generation of people in their 40's and 50's who are still single and who have lost their sense of reality about relationships.

Getting Ready for Your Date

Run through our checklist as prep for your next big night out!

1. Keep things in perspective, it is only a date. Your life does not depend on it, whatever you may be thinking.

2. Give yourself enough time to get ready so that you can soak in the bath or shower and contemplate.

3. Make sure you know what you will be wearing some time before you get ready and do make an effort to look nice.

4. Play some nice music that gets you in the mood and makes you feel good. Accompany this with a single glass of wine to mellow you out.

5. Make sure you know where you are going and what time you need to be there and make sure you know where you are going and how you are going to get there. Book a cab with time to spare.

6. Quality Aftershaves, colognes and perfumes only please and do not over do things. Whilst your own nostrils may not be able to detect the half a bottle of Hugo Boss you have just drenched yourself in, your date will not be able to see you though the vapor cloud. The same goes for the girls.

7. Give some though to what you are going to talk about and what things you would like to avoid. It isn't quite an interview situation and should never feel like one, but some of the same rules apply. Preparation is everything.

8. Especially for a woman, tell a good friend where you are going and carry a cell phone and follow all the safe dating rules that apply. It is your responsibility to feel safe and secure.

9. For men, ensure your shoes are sparkling and that you have remembered the accessories such as nice belt, watch and wallet. The details may not be so important to you, but they speak volumes about you.

10. Try to eradicate any feelings at all that this date has to work. It doesn't, it is just a night out. If things do work out then great, but as I said at the beginning, be cool. Your date will spot any subtle signs of desperation on your part a mile away which is why before arriving on a date you should do everything to make yourself relax.

11. As a guy, if you wish to take flowers along, that's nice but keep the proportions small and make things subtle and stylish.

12. Do not imagine you are going to have sex this evening even though it may not be far from your mind. By the same token, do make sure that your bed sheets are fresh and the place is tidy, just in case.

13. Whilst bathing spend some time thinking about all the things you would like to ask your date and what humorous stories you can tell. Picture the person you think you are about to meet and what you have to say about yourself, particularly with reference to any questions they may ask you.

14. Even at this early stage remember that you will not be telling anyone that you love them this evening.

15. Think about your body signals in advance as well as remembering how to read theirs so that you can pick up all the standard interest signals. It makes dating fun when you can read what they are thinking about you.

General Dating Rules For Men

You are a guy who is always in a serious relationship. You are a guy who hasn't dated in years. Or maybe you're a guy who has never been successful with women. Whatever your situation, there are some common dating rules to follow when venturing into the dating jungle. These conventions even the playing field, preparing you for success while protected your emotions. Women are trained from day one in the art of dating warfare. They have a physical and emotional arsenal that you may never hope to match. But you won't be outgunned if you properly prepare for the battle.

1. Look your best. Get some decent clothes and shoes. Women always look at your shoes, even if you last checked your Nikes in 1996. Get clothes that fit you, suit you and are contemporary. Don't just buy one outfit, sort out your entire wardrobe. Buy a nice tailored suit, there is no excuse not to. If you can't take care of yourself, how are you going to take care of her?

2. Sort out your hygiene and styling. Go down to the barbers and clean up your hair, getting it styled if possible. If you don't have much hair, still get down to the salon, maybe get your head shaved. Or just get a regular shave, a professional shave will leave your face looking and feeling great. Then it is off to the shops with you for good quality cologne and a grooming kit. Men are so often criticized for smelling bad. Get into a regular showering routine so you will always smell fresh and clean. Women appreciate it.

3. Sort out your job if you have one. Women want a man who has some ambition in life. Coasting along as a skateboard instructor is generally not going to win you a real catch (though I'd give it a go, I love skateboarding). Any job is better than none, but knuckle down and sort out some direction in your life. If possible try and look like you have something of a career. If you have a manual job, at least have some plans to work for yourself, and if you already do, then you are on the right track. But know what you are about work wise and have some idea of your future plans because women will ask questions about your prospects. Even if they pretend it isn't important, it is.

4. Be in the know. Make sure you are up to date with current affairs, watch the news and read quality papers. Women do not appreciate stupidity, and laziness is no excuse for sounding dumb. Current affairs are important in showing you know all about the world we live in. If you travel a lot then this will help tremendously. If you don't, make plans to travel and tell her about it. Proving you are willing and able to plan vacations is essential in the grand scheme of things.

5. Do not extol the virtues of drinking in the bar 5 nights a week. This will never win any fair princess's heart. If you spend all your time boozing with the boys, it's time to take a step back and pick up some more productive habits. Taking your lady for a drink is fine, especially if you take her to get cocktails at a nice lounge, but give them the impression that you live there will get you absolutely nowhere fast.

6. Keep your super fan status in check. If you love your sports and enjoying watch the game with your buddies, fine. If sport is a religion and you have your favorite player's number tattooed on your back, you may have a problem. If you are serious about dating, rattling off baseball stats, ranting about unfair umpires and constantly check the score will put them off in record time. To the uninitiated, sports are completely boring, and many women interpret the obsession as a total lack of thought, creativity or inspiration. Millions of girls love sports too, and rooting for the same team is great, but don't make your passion into a one-sided one.

9. Never expect sex on a first date. If all you are after is sex, you have come to the wrong place for reading material. If you are looking for the girl of your dreams, there is nothing sexier than a patient man. You are easily capable of waiting for the right woman.

10. Read up on manners, courtesy and chivalry. A woman likes being treated with respect. Lose the coarse language, the swear words, the rudeness and the laziness. Know how to eat in a top restaurant. Know about fashion, jewelry and flowers. Know how to hold a door open for a woman, let her go first and help her with her seat. Listen to what she says but have opinions of your own too. Show her respect and manners at every step and you'll be on the right path.

11. Start listening and stop talking. Keep your date interested but don't turn into a one-man circus. She will bore of you quickly because she wants to talk about herself too. Listen to things she tells you about her and remember them. Women love to chat so you need to learn to listen to her. Remembering things she told you will impress her even more.

12. Give up smoking. Now.

13. Learn to dance even if you have two left feet. Women love to dance and it puts you two in close contact. It is also romantic and sexy. You can be the world's worst dancer, I don't care. But if you stay seated when she is on that dance floor you may as well not exist. Try joining salsa and ballroom classes. You don't need to be Travolta but you should have an idea of the basics of rhythm. Get started today.

6 Topics for “Attractive “Conversation with Women

Whenever men seem to get to the point in a conversation with a woman where it reaches an awkward silence – something that anyone who has time in the dating world knows, happens quite often – they always resort to the same style of conversation: Rapid-fire interrogation. These quick questions about the woman’s life (“What school did you go to?”, “Where are you from?”, “What do you do?”) never lead anywhere, usually causing the woman to be bored and looking for the next topic of conversation.

Instead of falling into that trap when talking to women, here are 6 different conversation topics you can use to keep the awkward silences to a minimum while keeping the excitement of the conversation to a maximum.

1. Speak your passions

More than anything else, pushing a conversation topic in the direction of your own passion is the best way to keep a conversation going. Instead of thinking too much about trying to maintain the conversation, by talking about your own passions you can just begin to have fun and show your excitement about the topic at hand. This will not only show your own intelligence – since you’re talking about your passion, you’ll automatically know about it – but also give the woman a glimpse into your own emotion and excitement. Women are always looking for this in a man.

In the same way, if the woman begins talking about her own passion, ask her about it even if it’s not your own passion. This will allow her to feel excited while talking to you (something that is never a bad thing) and give her a chance to talk about herself, offering clues as to her personality that you can come back to later on in the conversation.

2. Observe your surroundings

Something I always enjoy doing when I’m talking to a woman at a bar is observing the surrounding people with her and making stories about everyone. This will not only show your creative side, but also allow you to get a grasp of her sense of humor, something that will help with future conversations later on in the night.

3. Your youth

Childhood is a time that stays with everyone forever and something we all can relate to, so speaking about your own experiences at a child not only allows her a window into your own soul, but also gives her a chance to relate with some of her own experiences. Feel free to go down this path of reminiscing to open up the topic of conversation.

4. Travel talk

While everyone loves to talk about travel, the important thing to keep in mind here is to get her to talk about travel, not you. You don’t want to look like you’re showing off or some off as someone trying too hard. Instead, use this as an opportunity to learn more about her beliefs, feelings, cultural awareness, etc.

5. Self-analysis

When talking about anything, whether it be your passions or your childhood, it is important to shade any story in a way where you “learn something from it”. This will once again give you an opportunity to show your depth of thought while also opening up various streams of conversation topics by adding an extra layer of subject matter to the conversation at hand.

6. Pop culture

If you need a conversation placeholder – something to keep the conversation from stumbling into an awkward silence without resorting to that interrogation mode – then feel free to discuss about the various pop culture things that are going on at the time. But make sure not to stay on this topic too long, or she will quickly become bored with it. And you.

by Bobby Rio, author of Make Small Talk Sexy

Elements of True Love

1. Forgiveness: ".....is not easily provoked" I Cor. 13:5. True love is not easily provoked and when provoked; ready to forgive immediately.
2. Selflessness: Lust is always selfish, it want sex to satisfy him. Whatever happens to the other party does not concern him. True love on the other hand is selfless. It looks for the way to satisfy the other party. It makes sure she is not hurt and is ready to wait till wedding day before sex, because it is not selfish.
3. Excitement: True love looks forward to see the other party again, she is unhappy to see he goes, not because of money or sex. In fact she is ready to pay his transport fare if he has none just for him to come and say hello! If you are engaged with somebody who is not excited seeing you, he is not proud to introduce you to friends and family, know that you have not gotten a lover yet.
4. Righteousness: Purity is the hallmark of true love. It does not involve secret kissing, dark place meetings, street corner romance, illicit sex, embrace that embarrasses God, unholy fondling, necking and immoral intimacy. True love has nothing to hide, it does not have any secret; it is as bold as a lion. If holiness is lacking in that relationship of yours, then it is not true love, it is lust no matter how you feel about it. If your pastor must not know what you are doing behind close door, if your parent must not hear about what you are doing with that guy, then it is not love, it may be hard for you to agree with me, the fact still remains that, it is lust not love, because "love does not rejoice in iniquity..." I Cor. 13:6.
5. Peace: Have you lost your peace because you are in love? Have fear, guilt, regret and worry envelop you because you are deeply in love? Then it is not God's type of love, because God is not an author of confusion but of peace.
6. Fondness: If you are not fond of the person you said you love or you do not want people to know that you are in love with him, you only want her when you are behind closed doors or you only want him when calendar reads 25th day of the month because you know he will soon get his salary, then it is not genuine love.
7. Patience: Is your partner pestering you with sex? Did he say he cannot wait that he wants you now else he will drop you? Do not give in, this is evidence that he has never been in love with you, if you give in to him, he will still drop you anyway.
8. Submission: "Love does not parade itself, is not puffed up" I Cor. 13: 14. Love is ready to submit to the wish of the other party, it is not proud, it does not parade itself. It is ready to say "let's go ahead if that is how you want it".
9. Commitment: True love involves commitment of the spirit, soul and body. It gives everything into the relationship. It writes letters send e-mails, make phone calls, pay visits and gives gift. They are moved by the plight of their partners. They look forward to seeing each other. They are ready to call for reconciliation whenever there is a misunderstanding. They are deeply committed to each other.
10. Sacrifice: True love is not only committed to the other party, but also ready to make sacrifice. A university undergraduate once used her school fees and personal food allowance to pay for the medical bills of her fiance. That is sacrifice and that is love. A young lady once refused to be her friend's chief bridesmaid and used the money she would have use to buy her dress, shoes and bag to pay for her fiance school fees. That is what I call true love. Love is sacrificial.[www.articlesbase.com]

10 Things You Need to Know About Love

1. Love does not hurt. Physical and/or emotional abuse are not a part of love. 
2. Love is not manipulative, it should not be used to get others to do what you want. You should never give in to demands based on the, "You would do it if you loved me!" tactic. 
3. Love is an intense feeling of caring for another person. It can take many different forms (romantic, friendly, familial) but it is always about caring. 
4. Although it is true that a big part of love is putting another person's happiness ahead of your own this never  includes compromising your values or being untrue to yourself.
5. If somebody asks you to do something that you don't want to do in order to "prove" your love they do not love you the way you might think they do. When you love another person you don't ask them to sacrifice a part of themselves in the name of that love. 
6. It is very easy to confuse lust for love. The true measure of romantic love is commitment and trust not physical attraction. 
7. It is possible to feel romantic love for more than one person at a given time. Just think, if it is possible for you to love both of your parents at the same time why would it be impossible to feel romantic love for two people at once? Don't beat yourself up emotionally if you find yourself in this unhappy situation. But be sure to remain single and be open and honest with all parties about your feelings and confusion. 
8. Sex is NOT love. Love is NOT sex. Sex can be a part of romantic love but it is never mandatory.
9. Romantic love can (and often does) fade. When it goes there is not always a reason. When somebody falls out of love with you it does not reflect upon your value as a person or your desirability. 
10. Love should make you feel happy, secure and appreciated.[About.com]

Great tips for a Successful Date

Looking for love can be hard and when you find it, it’s important that you keep onto it for the long haul. You’ll love dating for this matter as you find all about that special partner that you had to look for, for quite some time. The first date can be the hard one, but if you follow some simple steps we can keep looking for love at a minimum and love dating at a all time rate. Keep reading as ladies give you the top ten tips for a successful date. Women you have been looking for love yourselves and if you want to love dating, you can follow these tips too. Most of them are not gender specific.

The first part of getting to love dating is to remember that for this moment in time you are no longer looking for love. Keep the date focused on your partner and even if this is a blind date set up by your annoying mother or your ever comforting friends pretend you love dating. Don’t talk about your exes unless the partner brings up the topic. And don’t talk about other dates you have been on either. We know the other person is looking for love dating also or they wouldn’t be on a date with you, but come on. They may not love dating anymore than you do so the topic of exes and dating might be iffy.

The next part of acting like you love dating is not pressing the issue of sex. This is a time for looking for love, not your next booty call. So, focus on who your date is and what his or her interests are. Not about what makes those special places tingle or when you can get them in bed. We know you have needs, but when you are looking for love, those needs need to come last. When you act as if you like dating, it’s all about making the other partner comfortable.

The next part is joke a bit. The first things many people are looking for when they are looking for love dating are people who have a good sense of humor. Besides the idea that you totally love dating is a pretty funny topic.

The major thing you need to think of when you are looking for love and on that date that you might not love dating is personal hygiene. Even though you might not be thrilled with the idea of dating put some effort into looking nice. Most people base off of appearance first so first impressions is essential.

Keep in mind that they took time out of their busy schedules. They are looking for love, but they don’t have to love dating you. That means, they cleared the time for you so make it seem like you want to be there even if you don’t want to be.

Some of the other tips are plain and simple there are five of them. Be on time and let them know what you look like. Pick a nice quiet spot in a public area for the first date. Do the things that society expects of you. Guys this means holding doors and the works. Don’t talk on your cell phone or look at your watch. Over all, don’t be superficial and you can have a spectacular date.

Where to Find True Love??

Although it would be able to find true love on a roadmap and have the exact destination mapped out for you previous to your trip, sometimes the path you need to take to find love is not so obvious. Oftentimes, you may fail at what you thought was true love many times before you find love that is going to stand the test of time. Of course it doesn’t help that the term test of time is a vague all encompassing term, but that is exactly what makes it so hard to find true love as you never know what is going to be around the corner and what will arise that will make it harder for you to find love that is real and pure.

Oftentimes however, we may be concentrating so hard on finding true love, that we can miss the opportunities to find love that are right in front of us. If you are not having much luck in your search to find love you need to take a look at what is in front of you and where you may be missing true love that is waiting right under your nose to be discovered.

For example, if you have a best friend of the opposite sex, (Will & Grace style) without the gay partner, you may have already found true love as your bounds have withstanding years of weathering (Chandler & Monica, Friends) without you even realizing it. You need to take a close look at those around you and see if there is true love that you simply need to reach out for in order to correctly find love. Nobody can create something that is not really there, but there does tend to be natural attraction and affection whenever two people of the opposite sex have been friends for a very long time, and you may be ignoring the signs of true love in your busy quest to find love.

Of course, this may not be your answer to true love, as perhaps that person does not exist for you to find love in. Therefore, you may need to widen your search perimeters a little and expose yourself to the dating world more to find love. Not only are their many man to meet in your city and find love, there could be true love waiting for you on an online dating website. You never know where you can find love, but one thing you can be sure of, is that in your search for love you will find many people who are not the definition of true love, so sitting around waiting for true love to come to you is not going to work.

You have to be willing to get out there expose yourself so that true love can also come find you. Chances are when you find love, the person you find it from has been waiting just as long as you and will be happy to embrace true love, as soon as fate, and you yourself, help make it happen.

Where to Look and Find Love

Finding love is a complicated task. Your love should stay with you for the lifetime and you want your love to meet all your expectations. Dating is the best way to know more about the person you like so you shouldn’t rush it. You will know yourself if your dating partner is developing into a true romance. Again, finding love is a tough task. You can’t go straight up to a person and ask them to have a romance with you. Finding love involves meeting the person often and then going for dates for quite a while, although some people say they know this is their ultimate romance very early on.

Chat rooms

The advent of internet has made finding easier in some ways and more risky in others. You can find romance in a few minutes. Many online dating chat rooms are used as meeting points for singles looking for romance. You can enter a chat room and make new friends. It is no wonder when one of your friends turns out to be your true idea of romance. Apart from finding love in dating personals on the internet, you can also find many individuals willing to be your friends. Even if you are not finding love, you can at least make some new friends in the chat rooms.

Dating websites

Dating websites are now commonly used for finding love and romance. You have to create your account with your profile. In the website, you are allowed to make a search for a partner suiting your preferences. You can even get a date in your locality from these websites. After finding suitable individuals, you can talk to them via chat rooms and mails. If you are comfortable with the single, you can talk over the phone and meet in person and see if a romance develops. If you feel that you are not finding love, you can break off without any hard feelings.

Many teens prefer to use dating websites for finding love on account of the number of choices available. You can find many individuals meeting all your expectations for romance.

Traditionally, you have to spend time with a single person to know if that person is your true love. If the chemistry is not doing well, and this is not your idea of romance, you have to break off the relationship and then search for another person. In online dating websites, you can try finding love with different singles at the same time and from there choose a person who could be a perfect romance for you. If you are satisfied with your finding love, you can advance to getting married.

Precautions to be followed

Dating websites attract more teens, making the business owners profitable. This has led to the evolution of thousands of dating websites. Before joining any website in the hopes of finding love, look for user reviews and choose the one with positive reviews. Don't reveal your personal information too earl in what you think is a romance before knowing about the individual. This is important for all sorts of safety reasons. But if you are intelligent, you can go about finding love from dating websites without any problem.

The traditional routes of clubs and bars and your everyday life are still open, of course. You may find romance just around the corner from you, where you least expect it. Keep your eyes and heart open and you will be finding love in no time.

7 Ways to Turn your Friendship into Love

Many times, the best way to find true romance is to build a love friendship out of an existing relationship you have with someone you know. For instance, think of the true romance of Monica and Chandler on NBC’s Friends where you watched love friendship grow. Of course this was just a TV show, but the magic of the love friendship was that it was so perfect and a picture of two people just like us, who built a true romance out of their existing friendship. Therefore, true romance could be looking right at you in your love friendship, but you may need to work to develop it some, so here are seven ways to turn your friendship into love.

• Dress to impress - Oftentimes when you get comfortable being around a friend for too long, you forget that true romance starts with getting the other person to see you as a sexual being, and not just as one of the guys or girls so you need to get them looking at you in a love friendship kind of way first if you ever want true romance to ever develop.
• Online flirting - If you are too shy to use true romance tactics, you might try borderline flirtatious comments out when you are Instant Messaging the person you want the love friendship with. At first she or he may take them as a joke, but this person of your love friendship tactics, is eventually going to start to wonder on their own if true romance could be a possibility.
• Flirting in real life - Pretty obviously the follow-up in trying to find true romance with the friend you want to have the love friendship with. It’s a great way to follow-up and really leave them wondering about you and them in terms of true romance and a love friendship.
• Show interest in other people - Jealousy is a great way to get the person of your love friendship interests to see you both as a true romance prospect as they realize you have needs outside of being their friend. Oftentimes, they may realize they do have feels of love friendship towards you when they begin to question why your behavior is making them so jealous.
• Make yourself scarce for a bit - Nothing will help them to notice you more, when they realize you are not always around like they area use too. When they start to notice your absence in their life, they may begin to question if perhaps there is room for true romance in your love friendship.
• Become vital in their lives - On the flip side, you could make sure they see your love friendship possibilities by making sure you are part of every big part of their lives, so they ralize how lost they would be without you. This may cause them to start thinking maybe you too do have the makings for true romance.
• Make the move - Eventually, shy or not, someone is going to have to make the move if you want this to turn into true romance and a love friendship.

Maximize Your Love Potential

Receive the best by expecting the best.

You have the power to evoke from others the relationships that you desire. But you cannot get to a new-and-improved situation by giving your attention to a current situation that is lacking. The Universe, and all physical and Non-Physical players in it, is responding to the Vibrations that you are offering; and there is no distinction made between the Vibrations that you offer as you observe, and the Vibrations that you offer as you imagine. . . . If you will simply imagine your life as you want it to be, all cooperative components will be summoned. And even more important, all components that are summoned will cooperate. It is Law.

You have the power to evoke from others a relationship that is in harmony with the freedom, and the growth, and the joy that you seek, because within each of the others are those probabilities. Within each of them is the probability of someone being very understanding—or not. Of someone being very pleasant—or not. Of someone being very open-minded—or not. Of someone being very positive—or negative. The experience that you have with others is about what you evoke from them.

Have you had the experience of behaving with someone in a way that you had not intended? It just sort of came out of you suddenly? That was you experiencing the power of influence from another’s expectation. Have you noticed the personality of a child changing depending on which adult it is interacting with? Cooperative and pleasant with one person, and obstinate and cranky with another? You were witnessing the power of influence from another’s expectation.

When you train yourself into steady alignment with your own Broader Perspective, you will tap into the Energy that creates worlds, and you will be pleased by the positive response that you receive from those around you. No longer blame others with whom you share relationships; and instead, acknowledge that you are the attractor of your experience. True freedom comes from that understanding.

As you tend to your relationship between you (in your physical focus) and the Broader Perspective of your Inner Being, as you train yourself into the good-feeling thoughts of your Source, as you come into alignment with who-you-really-are, as you learn to love yourself—the others with whom you interact will not be able to buck that current of Well-Being. They will either love you back—or they will gravitate out of your experience.

A Brief Bedtime Exercise That Transforms Relationships

As you lie in your bed before sleeping, if you will think of good-feeling things from your past or present, or even speculate into your future, you will set the tone of the Vibration in which you will awaken in the morning. In the morning, when you first return to Consciousness, try to remember what you were thinking about in the evening, and make an effort to reestablish that positive trend of thought. This one small exercise will change the way everyone you meet responds to you in this new day. And as you do that—night after night, and then morning after morning—new patterns will emerge, and your relationships will transform.

by Esther and Jerry Hicks

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